Watts on Second - The 2nd Longest Queue

In the tradition of "Who's on First", Bulls Hit Weekly this week deals with the "2nd Longest Queue".

The queue to play second base at the Alice 2008 is almost as long as the queue for first base.

The qualities of a good second base are the ability to throw accurately (and the distance) to first (eliminates half the team), quickness to the base (what the hell does quickness mean?) and a good understanding of the game so that the right percentage play is made (the Alice squad doesn't even understand what a percentage is).

So the queue of (qualified) 2nd basemen is very short, but the queue for those that either think they are good enough or simply just wish to be hidden in the infield is very, very long.

Some contenders…

Billy Magoo has shown in recent weeks that he can make the double play at second and I reckon young Glen has also been sighted there over this winter.

Phil Hart, a seasoned (if not pickled) second baseman , has obvious strengths in camouflage and Zulu's penchant to not throw the ball or exert himself for any reason would place him in good stead.

Bob Booker has displayed some agility(?) this season and could be considered even along with our Inkurable Queenslander.

Let us not underestimate the abilities of Coach Watts - the opposition would need to hit the ball very accurately however.

Also for consideration are

  1. Gibbo
  2. Craig
  3. AJ
  4. Bruce Gordon and
  5. Greg Milburn
but the following aids would be required respectively
  1. anti-fem detector to keep him in position
  2. purpose-built frame to remain upright
  3. pack of cards hidden under the base
  4. a pass to proceed beyond first base and
  5. an assurance of good fishing in the vicinity of the base.

Danny and Rocket could not be considered because if they ever gloved the ball while in play they would merely return it to the Pitcher - force of habit you see.

I'm sure Coach Watts will dwell on this dilemma (and others) over the ensuing weeks to ensure that the exploits at 2nd base do not end up being 2nd rate.

Read "Bulls Hit Weekly" for more breaking news as the lead up to the Alice Masters intensifies.